Happy New Year!

CBS News will not round up or down for the sake of humility. Happy New Year from TV Party USA :D

MAD, RAD AND BAD- Working Out with the Ladies Part Two

Come on ladies, work it out!!

Lift those arms and punch that slut!

Get naked in the shower like you just don’t care

Cool off and repeat

Uhhh, really?

Or not...

You're not a crime movie!

You're a fun tv show!

Wot?

Have you gone mentul? Are you a complete nutta? Are you keeracked? Woy you'se a doggy ol' bird, ain't you? I otta have the blokes wif the butterfly nets put you in the lorry to the asylum, I should. I'm one step away from calling 999 I am. By Jove!

Puppy Break!!

Hooray for Puppies!!

Puppies on feet, puppies in the street, every puppy is one I want to meet!

And Kitties too!

We didn't forget about you.

Brought to you by Belly Timber, the timber for your belly mmmm

Children of the Food

Despite this man's choice to willing gorge himself on ridiculous amounts of food so that America can keep it's freedoms, children still remain largely concerned.

I don’t want to look…

Can he do it?

Can he do it? can he...HE DID IT!!!

USA! USA! USA!

You don't say

The history of every problem via some guy on a street in China.

I see those Pudding Councel creeps got to you, too!

BAD GIRLS CLUB Commercial Break

Look, the United States and its allies have now been in Afghanistan longer than the Soviet Union had been when it withdrew in 1989. Recent announcements by the U.S. appear to show that it plans to remain at least another four years. In the south, U.S. forces are increasingly encountering abandoned buildings that are heavily booby-trapped as they pursue the Taliban, leading them to systematically destroy the structures.







Alright, very true Kristen, the Taliban sucks people, come on. Don’t you just hate the Taliban Lea?

Lea killed Perez Hilton with a judo chop to the head. The audience loved it.

Loved it!

Rocky Mountain High

That's just how dangerous Colorado altitude sickness can be. In conjunction with pork, the lack of air fills the brain with a happy, satisfied feeling of togetherness. Colorado has its own Stockholm Syndrome.

THERE Will Be Model Blood

I told you from the beginning, don’t ever question the TYRA method. My anger at your disobedience is henceforth and fiercely.

Gulp

When I tell you to act one way and then change my mind inexplicably the next, you need to know how to adjust yourself to whatever airheaded whim I maybe having. Y’all all know what I did to Lisa.


(gasping)

I would normally pick the stupider girl, which is clearly you Nicole

Huh?

But it is you Jayla, that I’m unreasonably hating right now. I know I should sympathize with a pretty girl who didn’t have to work for anything, other than flash her ginormous boobs, pose in lingerie for horndogs and otherwise say totally idiotic things to an inexplicably captivated audience, but I do.

You are going to be my personal assistant. In charge of, BATHROOM DUTY.

OH NO!!! (whispering –she has IBS and she has it bad-)

Graakhslutreawlrhs;ghdaet!!!!!

They never saw Jayla after that. Or Nicole, who wandered into a Macy’s dressing room and was never heard from again.

whats going on? where am I?